Don’t talk with your headphones on

It was several months after getting hit by a car and I was still in a wheelchair. Dad took me to almost all of my appointments since it was reasonably close to his normal route for checking wells. Among the many things I received while in the hospital was a new Walkman which I used a lot and took everywhere I went including the doctor’s office. Since the wait times could be as long as an hour, you see where a Walkman and some tunes might come in handy. Well the thing you have to be careful of is that if you try to talk with when your headphones are on and the music is playing, if you attempt to speak at normal volume, you should compensate for the fact that you cannot hear your own voice otherwise you end up yelling.

Well at the age of 11, these things do not cross your mind or better yet, life’s experiences have not occurred yet. You can see where this is going. In a packed waiting area full of people, I saw the nurse open the door and by reading her lips, I saw her say Shawn Cutter. I meant to tell Dad, “hey they called my name” but instead said, “HEY, THEY CALLED MY NAME!” I started wheeling me towards the door while at the same time ripped my headphones off my head. The nurse was giving us both a weird look as we walked to the back office. Dad was so embarrassed and he took this out on my in the back by telling me I was not allowed to have headphones on anymore when he was around. He asked me if I know how loud I was yelling and of course at that time I had no idea.

It is little things that happen now in my life that triggers these little thoughts about my Dad. I thought of this a few days ago when I was in the pool and had my headphones on when someone was trying to ask me a question. Of course I cannot hear myself talk so I have make the best guess of just loud enough and this all goes back to the first time I realized I was not regulating the volume of my voice.

Shawn